more parents need to understand that teaching children to ask why rules exist is positive and valuable. teaching kids about authority–and that authority is not always right, and when and how to question it–is a fundamental step to preparing them for adult life.
do it right and you won’t get disobedient kids, you’ll get kids who think critically
I’ve mentioned this before, but my parents introduced a system where if they tell you to do something and there’s a reason you can’t do it, you can ask “May I appeal,” and they’ll listen to whatever new information you have to present and either revise their command or tell you to do it anyway. This serves a few purposes: first, it’s really funny to hear a four-year-old use legal jargon. Second, having a system in place for protest that isn’t whining, complaining, or outright disobedience makes things easier for the parents. Third, it fosters an environment of mutual respect. The child knows that his reasoning is taken into consideration when the parents’ decision is made, and the parent knows that the child may have legitimate reasons for not obeying a command, while still reserving the right to the final decision.
I do remember telling a teacher that her request was “out of her jurisdiction” in kindergarten so it can backfire just FYI
1. this first comment opened a whole new world for me, I adore this approach
2. to the second commenter: I see ZERO DOWNSIDE to this
okay i would like to be in a studio ghibli film but NOT for the cute houses or beautifully animated bread or even the magic. it’s like….u know how almost every ghibli film involves the main character going on some kind of lifechanging journey wherein their self-image solidifies & their heart grows & they flourish and mature in all that independence & form unexpected bonds with the most wonderful people along the way? i’d like to be in a ghibli film for that specifically
